I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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