Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
