I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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