I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
