I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
