think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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