I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize