Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
