very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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