I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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