i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize