So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I would ride that face into the sunset
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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