Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
