after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
