it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
