Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
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