But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
