So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
