Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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