I feel great
I just peed on a car
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
