I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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