is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
