i just wanna soil my oats bro
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
