I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
