he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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