I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Randomize
