So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I will be naked everywhere
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
