on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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