You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
