if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
