Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I cockslap morals
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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