Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Be still, my beating vagina.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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