So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
