I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
