2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
