I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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