Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i drank out of a bidet.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
