You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
