you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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