ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
