you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
