Sry I called you an 8
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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