Nicole vs. Life
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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