hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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