U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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