i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize