Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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