I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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