Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
ok first of all what the fuck
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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