Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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